Why You Don't Overfill Your Car Tires, A Public Service Announcement

This is a video from Chevy Chase, Maryland, of a man who apparently kept putting air in his right front tire for over two minutes before it finally gave up trying to rationalize with him and blew up in his face, which he’s lucky to still have. Did he think when the tire was full the air would just stop? Now I love putting air in my girlfriend’s tires at the gas station as much as the next guy who likes scoring brownie points while simultaneously huffing as many gas fumes as possible, but this is not how it’s done. For starters, he didn’t even take his shirt off and smear grease all over his chest. My girlfriend loves that move. “It’s so embarrassing.” And the sexy dance I do with the windshield squeegee between my legs?! “Remember how last time I left you at the gas station?” You said it was an accident!

Keep going for the video while I daydream about all the gas fumes I breathed that day waiting for her to come back (she didn’t, I had to walk home with a pounding headache).

Source: Geekologie – Why You Don’t Overfill Your Car Tires, A Public Service Announcement

Custom Horror Movie Character Garden Gnomes

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These are some of the custom horror movie character garden gnomes (‘Garden Nightmares’) made and sold by Casper and Sadie Revenant of RevenantFX (also available in their Etsy shop). They cost around $55 apiece and make the perfect addition to your Halloween garden or pumpkin patch. Want a horror movie character garden gnome but don’t have the money to spend? Just modify an existing garden gnome. That’s what I did, and now my neighbor is posting signs demanding whoever stole his garden gnomes return them. Haha, piss off, Mr. Martin, stop blowing your leaves into my yard.

Keep going for more.

Source: Geekologie – Custom Horror Movie Character Garden Gnomes

Well Hello There: Sexy Lounging Dr. Ian Malcolm From Jurassic Park 1:4 Scale Statues

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This is the 1:4 scale Dr. Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum) statue created by Chronicle Collectibles and available from Sideshow Toys. All that crazy mathematician sexiness doesn’t come cheap though, and the limited edition hunks are available for pre-order for $600. That’s a lot of money just to be able to set a miniature lounging Jeff Goldblum on your desk at work and give everyone who walks by an undeniable boner. Worth every penny, there’s no question, but still a lot of money.

Keep going for a bunch more shots.

Source: Geekologie – Well Hello There: Sexy Lounging Dr. Ian Malcolm From Jurassic Park 1:4 Scale Statues

Man Spends 200 Hours Building Entirely Wooden Bike (Except For The Chain Rollers And A Few Washers)

This is a video of Youtuber The Q spending 200 hours building a rideable bicycle entirely out of wood. Well, except for the chain rollers (the parts of the chain that make contact with the pedal gear) and a few washers, just like I mentioned in the title. Do a bunny hop! Obviously, it’s definitely not the most practical bike in the world to ride. Or practical at all. Why did you build this again? You might as well have gone all the way and made the wheels triangles. Just kidding it’s perfect do a car next would watch and subscribe.

Keep going for the video.

Source: Geekologie – Man Spends 200 Hours Building Entirely Wooden Bike (Except For The Chain Rollers And A Few Washers)

Fendi Pulls $1,000 Scarf After People Say It Looks Like Lady Privates

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Italian luxury fashion brand Fendi has pulled its $1,000 ‘Touch Of Fur’ shawl from online sale after everyone on the internet agreed it looks like a vagina. Some even went as far as to say it will make the wearer look like they’re being born. Personally, if I were Fendi I would have tripled production, but used faux fur instead of fox fur because I think we can all agree that, while what the fox said may be up for debate, it almost certainly was not ‘Please kill me so I can be the pubic hair of your $1,000 vagina scarf.’

Keep going for the same shot upside down for even greater realism.

Source: Geekologie – Fendi Pulls ,000 Scarf After People Say It Looks Like Lady Privates

How Warriors Really Fought In 14th Century Armor

This is a video discussion and demonstration of how medieval warriors really fought while wearing full armor. Basically, just slashing away with a sword was a waste of energy since the sword won’t cut through plate or mail armor. The key is to identify a weak point then STAB the business end of your sword right in there kabob style. In the video, potential weak points are identified as the palms (only covered by leather), armpits (where chain mail is often weakest), sliding a sword up under the neck mail to cut an opponent’s throat (gushing blood party) and groin (typically unprotected if you’ve been riding a horse). Valuable information. Granted nothing I didn’t already know, but I was born a bloody-thirsty warrior knight. “No, he was born at a truck stop.” Mom! “We thought he was a girl at first.” What?! “Till like his third birthday.” You know if the spaghetti wasn’t so good around here I’d be gone.

Keep going for the video, which was enjoyable.

Source: Geekologie – How Warriors Really Fought In 14th Century Armor

Watch A Bridge Buckle After A Charter Bus Ignores The Bridge's 10-Ton Weight Limit

This is a video from the one-lane Beaver Bridge in Beaver, Arkansas of a charter bus ignoring the bridge’s 10-ton weight limit and crossing, despite these buses typically weighing three to four times that. That bridge clearly isn’t thrilled about it, and you can see the whole thing buckling as the bus crosses. When reached for comment about the incident, the bus driver undoubtedly insisted he “was just following the GPS” and “these things should know better.” I assume he also mentioned the secret to good bus driving is the same secret to a successful marriage: never admitting you’ve made a mistake.

Keep going for the video while I try to console my nephew and explain I thought the weight limit for his Power Wheels Jurassic Park Jeep was merely a suggestion.

Source: Geekologie – Watch A Bridge Buckle After A Charter Bus Ignores The Bridge’s 10-Ton Weight Limit

Thanks, Internet!: A 46-Minute Compilation Of Every Time Bob Ross Cleaned A Paintbrush

This is ‘Beat The Devil Out Of It’, a 46-minute compilation that allegedly includes footage of every time Bob Ross cleaned a paintbrush on The Joy Of Painting. I’m not at all ashamed to admit I just watched it all the way through twice and I feel like it was missing a couple of my favorite brush whackings, but I could just be remembering wrong. My memory is, how do I put this– “Complete garbage.” Honey! What makes you say that? Is it your birthday? Shit, it’s your birthday, isn’t it? “AND our anniversary.” The ol’ double whammy — how do I always forget that?! I knew it was sometime in September. “October.” I’m sorry honey, I swear I’ll make it up to you next year. “You said that last year.” And I believe I really meant it at the time!

Keep going for the video.

Source: Geekologie – Thanks, Internet!: A 46-Minute Compilation Of Every Time Bob Ross Cleaned A Paintbrush

'Puppy Doing Cat Things': Dog Knocks A Line Of Shampoo Bottles One-By-One Into The Shower

Presumably after learning a thing or two from his feline friends on the back of the school bus, this is a video of a puppy knocking a line of shampoo and soap bottles into the shower one-by-one. He looks pretty proud of himself, doesn’t it? He also looks like he has an adult dog head on a puppy body. Just don’t tell him that though or it might give him a complex. Wait — is that my deep cleansing pore scrub? Oh hell no. You look like two puzzle pieces that fit, dog! Also, is this considered a trick? Because my dogs knock stuff over all the time but I haven’t been giving them treats and now I’m feeling guilty.

Keep going for the whole video.

Source: Geekologie – ‘Puppy Doing Cat Things’: Dog Knocks A Line Of Shampoo Bottles One-By-One Into The Shower

Game Developer Developing Snetris, A Snake + Tetris Mashup

This is a short video of Snetris, a Snake and Tetris mashup currently being developed by Portuguese crowdfunded minigame creator nyunesa. The concept is simple enough: you start off as a snake, and as soon as you eat the dot on the playfield you lock into the Tetris shape you’re currently in and fall. Fun! I mean sure it’s no Fortnite, but I also probably won’t get so angry playing that my mom threatens to change the Wi-Fi password. “I don’t understand what it with him and that game.” These people know how I feel about doing battle, mom, I have a reputation to uphold. “He’s never finished better than 82th place.” Stop! “And he had to cheat to do that.” AS;GDLPQFDSN DFDFAS!!111

Thanks to Rob, who can’t wait for the inevitable Pong x Pac-Man mashup.

Source: Geekologie – Game Developer Developing Snetris, A Snake + Tetris Mashup

The 2018 Wind Games Indoor Skydiving Freestyle Championship Performance

These are two videos of 15-year old Kyra Poh’s winning indoor skydiving freestyle performance at the 2018 Wind Games in Empuriabrava, Spain. And speaking of wind games– “I’m not pulling your finger.” *BRRAAAAAAP!* My trigger is faulty anyways.

Keep going for the videos.

Source: Geekologie – The 2018 Wind Games Indoor Skydiving Freestyle Championship Performance

Not Today, Death!: Giant Boulder Crushes Hood Of Car On Mountain Road

This is some dashcam footage from a mountain road in southwest China of a boulder absolutely obliterating the hood of an SUV before splintering a tree into toothpicks and continuing its way down the mountain. There are also a couple other boulders that follow, proving my theory that boulders are pack animals like wolves. Thankfully, there were no injuries in the incident, presumably because Death realized he had the wrong car at the very last second. No word who his intended target was, but I can only assume it was me. “But you’re nowhere near China.” I’m sorry, are we talking about the same Death here? Like the hitman and not the geographer professor, right? Jesus, he kills people for a living, he isn’t an undefeated Jeopardy constant.

Keep going for the video.

Source: Geekologie – Not Today, Death!: Giant Boulder Crushes Hood Of Car On Mountain Road

Oh Wow: This $100 Light-Up, Musical Death Star Christmas Tree Topper

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This is the Hallmark Keepsake Star Wars Death Star Lighted Christmas Tree Topper. It costs around $100, lights up blue or red with green superlaser, and can play the Imperial March and classic Star Wars theme (lights and songs selected via included remote control). Cool I suppose, but $100 cool? Like the bunny slope at a ski resort, that sounds a little steep to me. I feel like this should be more of a $30 product. But what do I know? I’m just a man who’s been using the same Christmas tree topper since he was old enough to buy his own tree. “Is that a bra?” Classic, right? “Wait did you say classy or classic?” Well it’s both, obviously.

Keep going for a few more shots.

Source: Geekologie – Oh Wow: This 0 Light-Up, Musical Death Star Christmas Tree Topper

Boston Dynamics' Spot Robot Dances To 'Uptown Funk'

Because not perceiving a threat as a threat is how they’re gonna get us, this is a video of Boston Dynamics’ Spot quadruped robot dancing to Bruno Mars’ ‘Uptown Funk’. Now I’m not sure what that move it’s performing in the gif is called besides inappropriate. I’ve seen more family-friendly dancing at strip clubs before. Back me up, Brandi! “He’s always bringing his nephew in for the buffet.” It really is a great value.

Keep going for the whole video.

Source: Geekologie – Boston Dynamics’ Spot Robot Dances To ‘Uptown Funk’

Finally, A Super Mario Boo Ghost Beanbag Chair

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This is the officially licensed Super Mario Bros Boo beanbag chair available from ThinkGeek and Gamestop. It costs around $140 (plus shipping or pickup from a Gamestop) and measures approximately 38″ wide x 28″ tall x 38″ deep. Obviously, they used a relatively small child in the product photo, and Boo would not look as large with me sitting on him. “Like a pumpkin riding a marshmallow.” Such vivid imagery. Thankfully, the chair’s outer fabric is removable and washable, which is pretty important considering just how white it is. I can’t imagine Boo here hiding too many stains. However he will be hiding my stash. “Drugs?” Candy and nudie mags. “Oldschool style.” You know how we do.

Thanks to Christina D, who informed me this is the perfect beanbag chair for always leaving somewhere different around the house.

Source: Geekologie – Finally, A Super Mario Boo Ghost Beanbag Chair

Uh-Oh: Drag Racer's Parachute Fails During Race

This is a video of Pro Mod drag racer Mike Bowman’s parachute failing during a qualifying race in St. Louis. Thankfully, there’s a safety net at the end of the track that catches his ’69 Chevelle, and he’s able to walk away from the incident unharmed. Obviously, my drag strip might require a few modifications before being put to use for sanctioned racing. “You dug a moat at the end of the track and filled it with crocodiles.” Oh, and I suppose the first drag strip you ever built was just perfect.

Keep going for the whole glowing brakes video.

Source: Geekologie – Uh-Oh: Drag Racer’s Parachute Fails During Race

Sorry I'm Late!: Video Of A Five-Foot Python Falling Out Of The Ceiling In A Bank

This is some security cam footage from a bank in Nanning, southern China, of a five-foot python falling out of the ceiling and disrupting a staff meeting. “Shit, this isn’t the vault!” I imagine the snake realizing as it fell. Sucks too because now I’m gonna have to start training a whole new python.

Keep going for the video.

Source: Geekologie – Sorry I’m Late!: Video Of A Five-Foot Python Falling Out Of The Ceiling In A Bank

Skydivers Take Turns Falling Through A Ring Of Other Skydivers Holding Hands

This is a video of a bunch of skydivers holding hands to form a ring while other skydivers take turns falling through their little mile-high friendship circle. Why? I’m not really sure, but I assume they got bored of regular low-fat vanilla flavored skydiving and decided they needed to invent games to spice it up a bit. Admittedly, I’ve done the same thing before, but in the bedroom. Just ask my girlfriend. “I’m not sure he really grasps the concept.” HAHA — CONNECT FOUR HONEY, YOU LOSE AGAIN.

Keep going for the video.

Source: Geekologie – Skydivers Take Turns Falling Through A Ring Of Other Skydivers Holding Hands

Not Today!: Heavy Winds Blow Waterfall Back Over Cliff

This is a video from the Isle Of Skye in Scotland where heavy winds caused by a storm blew a waterfall on Talisker Beach back up over the cliff it was trying to fall from. That’s pretty intense. I can only imagine if I were a waterfall watching this that I would have the absolute worst case of anxiety right now.

Keep going for the video of the waternotfall in action while I see if I can’t spot any more skull shapes in the mist.

Source: Geekologie – Not Today!: Heavy Winds Blow Waterfall Back Over Cliff

Custom $1,350 Game Boy, Nintendo And Super Nintendo Themed Air Jordans

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These are the Game Boy, Nintendo and Super Nintendo themed custom Air Jordan IV’s modded by Freaker Sneaks Customs. Each design is limited to only ten pairs and costs around $1,350. That is a lot of money. The only thing you’re going to see me wearing on my feet that cost more than $1,000 are these rocket boots. To infinity and beyond! “Have you even tested those yet?” Nope, this is the first time. *pushes button, feet explode* HELP ME FIND MY TOES.

Keep going for a bunch more shots.

Source: Geekologie – Custom ,350 Game Boy, Nintendo And Super Nintendo Themed Air Jordans